July 23, 2014 / 67,142 notes
July 22, 2014 with 298,065 notes



i just figured out the perfect murder

kill someone and bury them in their own garden

that way if the police find them they’ll think it was a suicide

#welp looks like the victim committed suicide and promptly buried themselves in their garden #how considerate of them

July 21, 2014 / 199,473 notes
July 21, 2014 with 668,587 notes


I wish boobs did the bra thing without having to wear the bra

July 21, 2014 / 279,477 notes
July 21, 2014 / 34,222 notes
July 21, 2014 with 159,467 notes



how come john lennon was shot by a fan and robin thicke still lives


yes hello police i would like to report SHOTS FIRED

July 21, 2014 with 213,860 notes



science side of tumblr, can you explain why there’s a void in my heart I can’t fill


July 21, 2014 / 6,495 notes
Anonymous said: How do you manage to have fun (sexually) with your girl while she is on her period?




First, I have no qualms about fucking My girl when she is on her period. 

I don’t because she prefers not to, for multiple reasons, primarily, you wouldn’t be all that interested in sex if you had the equivalent of a stomach ache from hell.

So what I tend to do, is man the fuck up, leave My dick in My pants, and I take care of My girl.

I make sure We have pain meds handy, as well as a good selection of movies, chocolate, and ice cream.

Then I cuddle the shit out of her for as long as she wants and go the fuck away when she wants to be left alone and come back and cuddle the shit out of her again when she wants Me back.

I don’t worry about how to have fun sexually. I worry instead about how to best take care of My partner.

Best answer ever 🙌

He the real MVP